used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Randomize
