i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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