Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Randomize