it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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