yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
Randomize
