Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Randomize
