so that wasnt chicken after all
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
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