I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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