Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
Randomize