if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
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