Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
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