Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
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and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
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