i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
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