that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
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