I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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