i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
