Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
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