my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Randomize
