he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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