she was so not down for the gang bang
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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