4 words: hood of his car
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
