Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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