I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
