At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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