Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
