Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have feelings that need drinking.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
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