my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
So much rum. So many feels.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
