I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
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