I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
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