the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
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