The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Randomize
