Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
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