Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
