My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Randomize
