you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
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