I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
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