Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Randomize
