I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
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