Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
