Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Randomize