he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Randomize
