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• (256): View more from Alabama

  I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod

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• (562): View more from California

  Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up

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• (614): View more from Ohio

  Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?

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• (413): View more from Massachusetts

  It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.

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• 

  25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (708): View more from Illinois

  I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?

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• (918): View more from Oklahoma

  I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.

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• (480): View more from Arizona

  You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.

  (602): View more from Arizona

  Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.

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• (817): View more from Texas

  Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...

  (1-817): View more from Texas

  This hangover makes more sense now

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• (440): View more from Ohio

  I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.

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• 

  These 23 People Share the Worst Advice They’ve Been Given

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (207): View more from Maine

  He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.

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• (908): View more from New Jersey

  There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.

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• (250): View more from British Columbia

  My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"

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• (865): View more from Tennessee

  I think he fucked my hip out of place.

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