Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
29 Of The Most Hilarious And Embarrassing Walks Of Shame Ever
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
These 23 Dudes Get Giddy From Dem Titties
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround