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• (952): View more from Minnesota

  I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak

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• (678): View more from Georgia

  stop calling my apartment porn island.

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• (860): View more from Connecticut

  And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that

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• (513): View more from Ohio

  sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.

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  If You’re Hot, It’s Easier For You To Do These 27 Things

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• (914): View more from New York

  i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.

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• (908): View more from New Jersey

  My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.

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• (778): View more from British Columbia

  some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.

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• (319): View more from Iowa

  Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.

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• (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure

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  23 Struggles Kids These Days Will Never Know

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• (917): View more from New York City

  I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.

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• (402): View more from Nebraska

  I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.

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• (314): View more from Missouri

  Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.

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• (620): View more from Kansas

  I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.

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• (907): View more from Alaska

  I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss

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• (626): View more from California

  Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair

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