the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize