Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
