dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize