I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
I came so hard my ears popped.
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