Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Randomize
