she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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