But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
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