I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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