I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
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