thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
This is my gift to your gina
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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